When I was just a little girl..

I asked my mama "what shall I be"? And I am still asking, going on 27 I still don't know my place in the world. And I am tired now of "Que sera, sera". It is about time it turns into something graspable (word, NanaY?).
My problem is that I suffer from severe indecisiveness.

When I was 20 my sister said: Hey, I found the perfect study for you. African Studies. Oh yes, so exciting, different, interesting, I'm gonna end up working in an aid organization, a orphanage in Africa, do great, adventurous (??) stuff blah blah blah. Did that happen? No. Did the studies totally break down all my stupid illusions? Yes. Did I gain the best friends ever, great experiences AND a husband indirectly through it? Oh yes.

So it's not all bad. It is just me who dont know how to put my education into use. In a village in Norway.
Now I am working in a kindergarten, that is all I have done since I completed my bachelor. And of course, travelled. I travelled back and forth to Ghana the 3 years after my degree, to be with hubby ♥
I spent time in Norway in between, working in different kindergartens, cos that's where I got work. Short term contracts, living at home with my parents, going back to Ghana... That was what life was about for a while, and I forgot about everything else. What will become of me? The goal was hubby to come here, and to get him here, I had to work, again. Being a student would not bring in the cash I needed to prove I had to get him here. I looked for work, now in another town. But it was still kindergarten I got. And I do love it, don't get me wrong. Working in kindergarten is very rewarding and meaningful and it gives me alot. But. I am not trained to work with children so my salary is low low low. I am not trained to work with kids so my responsibilities are less than what I think I am capable of. I want more challenges, I want more responsibility, I want more money.

This August the chance to go back to school is so very present. Hubby is here, I don't need to work for anything but for the fact that making my own money is so much better than living on a student loan... April 15th I must have submitted my applications. And I can't make a choice.

I feel so guilty cause I have all the opportunities in the world. I am so priviliged. I can get into anything I'd like (except those physics, medicine, science mathematics stuff that I hate anyway). I can be whatever I like.

JUST SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT I LIKE!

Ok, I'll make a list:

• I like to be creative. No, I LOVE it. I would LOVE to make a living just...creating SOMETHING, anything.
• I like the way we work in the kindergarten, all colleagues, together. Not in your own office, alone.
• I like to plan, organize, fix, write lists (but I am a control freak and having a job like that would make me take all the work home, and worry about work in my free time..).
• I like kids.
• Languages.

 I took two tests online that were gonna show me what job I am suited for. One said bartender. The other said I should work with in the field of health and social work. Anyone wanna pick for me?

I just wanna create. And make money. Unfortunately they don't always match so well. The schools are few, and/or private, meaning it costs my shirt to go to school there. The jobs are few. And the schools are far away from where we kind of wanna stay. 10 days. Clock is ticking. :-S

The pictures above is from my two jobs I ever held in Ghana. The first: unpaid nursery teacher in a public nursery. My plight there can be read of HERE.
The other pic is from my only real, paid job. As towel folder (and shop keeper) at Una Agencies Ltd. at Airport, Accra.

 I liked selling, the only problem was that everyone thought I was a customer there, so all the real customers approached my colleagues rather than me when they had a question. But when they allowed me to make beautiful gift baskets, with towels, soaps and candles, I was, again, happy. And creative... If I dont end this post now, it will never end. So consider it ended!



I made this... :-) Talent, huh??